20 Ocean City Observations & Questions

I just spent five days, four nights in Ocean City, Maryland. It’s been a few years since we’ve been at the beach. Here are 20 Ocean City observations and questions.

1. Too many Americans are obese.
2. Girls with fat thighs should not wear cutoffs or short shorts.
3. A bikini top with no support is not attractive. You will never convince me that a thong bikini bottom is comfortable.
4. Why is it fashionable for guys with big bellies to wear bathing trunks below the navel with their butt crack showing?
5. People on vacation eat fries and ice cream before lunch.
6. Anyone complaining about the cicada noise level should spend five minutes in an arcade.
7. Who are these people buying the $600,000+ condos on Coastal Highway??
8. Why have so many buildings here been torn down only to be rebuilt?
9. Schools in the mid-Atlantic don’t close until June. Yet an awful lot of school-aged children are here before Memorial Day.
10. This is supposed to be a nice hotel, but management can’t control the flies or keep the elevator fixed. 
11. Do parents who let their kids behave badly in the swimming pool allow them to behave badly in other public places?
12. The guests in the room next door must not realize we can hear them screaming at each other at 1 am.
13. Many adults are still wearing masks especially outdoors on the boardwalk. Why aren’t they vaccinated?
14. When I made our reservation, the lady told me our room was renovated. What she failed to tell me is that the renovation took place 20 years ago. 
15. Sadly, there’s not a whole lot to do in Ocean City when the weather is bad.
16. Goldberg’s Bagels would make a fortune here in the summer. 
17. Almost every business has a sign saying “We’re Hiring.”
18. Nothing beats the soothing sound of the waves coming ashore. 
19. The Haagan Daaz ice cream parlor on 120th street—the one with a picture of the Luvavitcher Rebbe—has been replaced by a Dairy Queen! 
20. The City has erected a fence along with median strip on Coastal Highway. No more jaywalking. Hopefully, no more pedestrian fatalities.

Read more by Eileen Creeger.