One of My Pet Peeves
I am not a prude, and though I think punning is the highest form of humor, I love a good joke, clean or dirty. (See below my favorite, though it is best heard with the right voice). What makes me peevish is the constant use of curse or dirty words. My college roommate’s mother did not have trouble with dirty words or obscene language, but yelling “go to hell” or “damn you” could come true, and unless you really wanted to curse someone, they were forbidden.
In anger or frustration, most of us swear. However, when we pepper our conversations and regularly use dirty words, they lose their power for when they are really needed.
Even George Carlin, who I thought was brilliant, in his “Seven Words Extended Version” bit said, “There are just some words, not many either, just a few that we’ve decided we won’t use them all the time.” Unfortunately, he then did proceed to do just that.
When someone says “F.U.,” and I don’t mean Felix Unger, I want to reply: “U wish.” If “doing it” is the greatest thing in the world, why would you wish it when you want to be insulting? One can even do it graphically! We have now made the word not only a verb but an adjective and an adverb. Maybe that is why it seems to be overused, every other word.
English is the richest language in the world because we have taken words from almost every other language. It’s why, though grammatically one of the easiest, its spelling and pronunciation are a nightmare. We’ll save that for another rant. Instead, I’ll end by saying, with all that variety, maybe we can be better wordsmiths, finding more descriptive and accurate words.
Promised Old Joke
Mickey Mouse wants to divorce Minnie Mouse and goes to an attorney. The attorney is taking down the information when his phone rings. He answers it and explains to Mickey Mouse that it’s an important call he needs to take right then. He asks if Mickey could come back in a few minutes.
Mickey says, “Sure.”
When Mickey returns, the lawyer reviews the notes, saying, “You are Mickey Mouse, and you want to divorce Minnie Mouse on the grounds that she’s crazy.”
Mickey replies: “I didn’t say she was crazy. I said she was fucking Goofy.”
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Read more by Ada Mark Strausberg